You… are… FREE! Act like it…

Hello Beauties!

My gosh, its been sooooo longgggg! Like, its been FOREVER since I have been able to chat with you.  And, if I can be completely honest I would say, LIFE got in the way. Okay, see.. NO. That’s not even the TRUTH. Sis, I GOT IN THE WAY! Yes, I….Vesta… Blank Blank…. Greene (Cant share my middle name ROFL.. #embarrassing) got in MY OWN WAY!

Man, I just let the enemy sucker punch me right in the face! For reals. Now, am I proud of it? No! Not by any means. But its the truth and I told you, here, I am going to be nothing LESS than 1000% transparent with you. So, for about 3 months, I let ALL of my fears and insecurities tuck me into my bed at night AND, hold my hand as I walked throughout my day. I walked too close with the lies of the enemy and it nearly almost consumed me.

But anywhosers, That’s a story for another day! lol

What I really wanted to talk about today was FREEDOM. Freedom in the Lord Jesus Christ and what that REALLY and truly looks like. For about a year now, it seems as if the Lord has had me on this journey of getting to truly know WHO He is by the way of intimacy; not “He said, She said” or, by the checking of a list.  I believe right now in our society “Christianity” or our “Spiritual Practices” are becoming exactly that…. PRACTICES or RELIGIOUS CYCLES, instead of the outward expressions of our INTIMATE RELATIONS.

When you KNOW of someone, you sorta just know things ABOUT them from what you’ve heard or “assumed”. But KNOWING someone is being VERY confident and SURE of who they are and feeling SAFE interacting with character they portray. Well, at one point. I KNEW of God. And, I assumed He was a God that hated me unless I read the bible EVERY day, prayed 3-6hrs straight, or knew at least 60 out of 66 books of the bible like the back of my hand. I really thought I had to DO things to “WIN” His attention, to literally stay alive,  or be considered a TRUE Christian. Like I thought He wouldn’t claim me unless I could complete ALL of these awesome accomplishments like I see advertised and bragged about ALL over the church pulpits or even social media. But, let me set this straight now, there are NO works that will “make” our Heavenly Father love you. You are His because you are YOU.

See, I didn’t truly KNOW the truth. Because I didn’t really know my Heavenly Father.  I sorta just knew of Him. And, like ALL children not knowing their origin, their TRUE beginning, their FAMILY… abandonment issues begin and the LIES of the enemy tramples in. And, we seem to cling hold to anything we hear. But, God is a GOOD GOOD Father and He stepped in and rescued me before the grip of the enemy could get any tighter. And, with what I am about to share, I pray these words inspired by Christ does the same for you as He did for me. RESCUES and SETS FREE.

When Jesus died on the cross, we were freed from the bondage/pressure of being “Justified” righteous by works. It was no longer about what we DID, to be righteous but whom/what we believed in. Moses was given the law to pretty much help show us our sins, and how hard it was to uphold the law in excellence without the help of grace. Not breaking ANY of the laws was the ONLY was you could be considered righteous, which if we can be honest, was IMPOSSIBLE! So God pretty much gave Moses the law for us, as a way to help us appreciate what was to come. To show us how much we really needed Jesus, how much we needed His grace and mercy. The law was used as a “mirror” if you will, to show us ourselves.

Now look at this. When God gave Moses the law it was ONLY for the JEWS; meaning NO ONE except Jews could have a possibility of being saved! But when Jesus died for our sins, He died so that we ALL could have a chance, not just the Jews. He also did it, so that we would no longer have to compare ourselves to or uphold 613 laws any longer. He did away with them and fulfilled them ALL at the same time.  Check this out, when Jesus died for us, we were ONLY gives 2 commandments/laws; to love God with ALL of our hearts and to love our neighbors as ourselves.  Which in turn covered the other laws that were made with Moses, because if you love God, there is NO way you could break those 2 commandments.

How amazing is that?! Such GRACE and MERCY!

Beautie, I have a question for you! What are “man made” laws that we follow today in own ritualistic lives (ones made up in the church or our society) that we THINK can justify our salvation and righteousness? Even though God made it easy for us when He said to JUST BELIEVE in our hearts and be willing to confess it with our mouths, that Jesus is LORD. What else are we trying to do to prove we are worthy or “saved”?

We must stop WORKING for what was FREELY given! That’s just like someone giving you the option of getting a free sandwich just by you being YOU or giving you the sandwich by running 10 miles for it. What would you chose? The option without the running, huh? lol EXACTLY! Why are we treating Gods gift any different? We don’t have to work for His love and salvation! We just have to simply….BE! And, Love Him and His people and ALL else will fall into place!

NO WORKS, NO STRIVING can make you more “attractive” to God. He loves you for YOU! Just like He loved Abraham and considered Him righteous by Faith before he even got circumcised (WORKS). It was because before ALL, He believed and that’s ALL God wanted. His FAITH.  NO BIBLE READING, PRAYING, GIVING, SERVING, OR STRIVING WILL MAKE YOU “HOLIER”. None of those are “Forced requirements” by God. He gives us free will and if the undertone of your actions are forced, if your heart isn’t pleasing to God while doing it, it doesn’t count anyway. Do it because you love God. Do it because you want to spread His light. Simply loving God will result in doing those things NATURALLY, trust me!

So, Beautie, I pray this post inspires, and ministers to you in some way! I have struggled for a while with thinking I had to do things perfectly for God to love me. That I had to check off these boxes before I could call on His name. And, it wrecked me. Because sometimes life just gets in the way or we get in the way of ourselves and its HARD to bring out ourselves without calling on Him.  It skewed with my view of life, others, and even myself. It caused months of depression, anxiety, and brokenness. Because I didn’t really understand the true meaning of His Grace or His love. I didn’t understand the BEAUTY of Jesus dying on the Cross. I knew of it, but I didn’t get it.

Sis, it took major isolation and consecration to get to this point. Many valley moments to come to this revelation but I thank God with ALL of my heart and Give Him ALL of the Glory for rescuing me. For showing me what TRUE freedom in Him is, so that I now may share it with you. I’d be darned if I’d let you go through the torment that I went through.

Remember…

You don’t have to check off the “Christian Work Checklist” to gain His love or approval. YOU’VE ALREADY GOT IT. Just live it! FREELY!

You are free Beautie, so ACT LIKE IT!

I love you Girly!

Till’ Next Time,

Vesta <3

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3 Helpful Ways to Maneuver through your Broken Season:

Hello Beauties!

How are you love?  You are looking quite spiffy today…. (winks and smiles intensely).

So glad that you are here!

So, last post we talked about our brokenness, right? Specifically, how the enemy tends to make us want to sulk in our broken moments and then, make us feel bad about it. Also, how sometimes we tend to want to run away from those feelings and NOT truly embrace them. Or go to God with them. Well, TODAY, I want to talk about WHAT YOU CAN DO when you are feeling this way. When you just cant seem to shake the overwhelming feeling of sadness? When it hurts to simply crack a smile? When you are wondering where God is and feeling absolutely defeated? Yup, I have been there! I got you girly, and here is what has helped me:

1. Journaling

When I began to feel overwhelmed with dark feelings and overwhelming emotions, I journal. I have found that journaling is VERY therapeutic to the soul. It’s as if my words can make it on to the paper seamlessly, where as, when I and verbalize them, my pride overtakes me. But for some reason, with writing it is different. I know this may sound silly, but its like there is no judgement. I feel complete freedom. My mind doesn’t have the chance to stop the things that I want to say, so my fingers have the liberty to express the hidden cries within. You will be amazed at how much you are holding in. You’ll start writing and wont realize that you have written for 30 minutes straight! It’s amazing! Such liberation when we break past the barriers in our minds. Oh, I also find that it is much easier to talk to God this way too. How? Well, I simply re-direct my mind and focus towards Him, as if I am writing Him a letter. And, soon it becomes my prayer. A beautiful page FULL of my brokenness, tears, and affirmations of my Father; ALL at the same time. And, What I mean by that is, I noticed that when we redirect our hearts and focus toward Him while in prayer; writing or verbally, we can hear Him respond with TRUTHS. It’s simply beautiful. I dare you to try it!

2. Listen to Worship (soaking) music

Now Sis, this one has truly saved my life. No joke! It is something about worshiping in the midst of your brokenness that brings about a beautiful release. When I go through my broken seasons, my spirit tends to long to worship. Not saying that I personally feel like it, but there is a long within to WORSHIP to, to CALL on God, and CRY OUT.  When you are down and out, we are to refocus ourselves to look to God. We can not allow the enemy to let us SULK there, because that is where the defeat happens. It occurs when we become selfish and focus ONLY on the problems (which is what the enemy wants). But, when you become selfless and give worship and credit where it is due, EVEN when you DON’T truly feel it or see it… THAT is when you Spirit can be renewed and strengthened. Because your eyes are now taken OFF of your situation and directed towards the HELPER. It’s like the things that looked impossible, soon begins to look POSSIBLE because you are realigned with the TRUTH of the Almighty God. You being to see the power again that simply holds weight within His name alone. Girly, it is sooooo… awesome!

3. Listen to Uplifting Messages/Sermons

Lastly, I listen I try to sermons or podcasts that are uplifting. Mainly, I tend to listen specifically to the ones that pertain to my current struggle (i.e, Lack of Faith, Identity, Loss, Insecurities, and etc). It helps me refocus and build myself back up on TRUTH when I honestly don’t have to strength to go to the word and find it for myself. Not that it is a good thing by any means. But I truly know what it feels like not to have the strength to search but just hoping that God can find you and meet you right where you are. I totally get it.  And, guess what? He can! God finds me EVERY time, because He knows what I am searching for, Him. It’s nothing else but Him. So he will MAKE SURE that He is found because He is a Good Father. Jealous Father. He knows we are seeking for that little ounce of hope, so He yearns to speak to our Spirits through where we put our focus. As long as we are open to Him speaking in such a way, He will. He is sooooo.. good! Isn’t He?

Man o Man, He simply blows my mind. I am just so humbled and grateful to have such an amazing Father. A father that knows this Christian walk isn’t an easy one, and that we FALL majority of the time. But, He is right there and willing to pick us back up. He is willing to lift up our heads by our chins, so that our eyes meet His. He knows sis, so don’t hide it from Him. Let Him heal you. Let Him fix you. Let Him MEET you where you are, and I pray these are ways in which He can. I hope these tips will be helpful to you! They have truly helped me and being a sister in Christ, I want to share ALL that has helped me, with YOU! Because…. we….are…. what? (chanting/screaming) We are here to do LIFE together! You got it girly!

I love you Beautie!

Till Next Time,

Vesta <3

 

 

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I AM SO SORRY, My Sister..

Hello Beauties!

How was your day? You look absolutely gorgeous today, BTW. Mine? It was pretty good. Thanks for asking! Your sweet. Okay, Soo.. I have something that I want to talk to you about. We have to have an actual SERIOUS conversation. Alright, here I go…I just want to apologize to you, personally. I want to say that I am truly sorry. “Sorry for what”, you ask? Okay, I’ll explain.

I am sorry for hiding my brokenness. I am sorry for holding back what it is that I go through and ONLY showing what I think would be “PLEASING” for you to see. I am sorry for taking it upon myself to be selective on what a “Christian Walk” should be viewed as. I am sorry for creating an image that doesn’t really exist. I know this all may be overwhelming so I’ll explain further.

Alright, well a couple of weeks ago and I was going through probably one of the DARKEST seasons of my life. I was so down and so depressed I couldn’t even try to crack a smile. Everything around me just irritated me and I was on edge for the simplest reasons. I couldn’t read the Word. I couldn’t pray. I couldn’t entertain ANYTHING that had to do with God. And what hurt the most was that I NEEDED Him but I couldn’t say it. I would try to form words with my lips to speak to my Heavenly Father, BUT those words couldn’t even amount to the cries of my soul. I was just so broken. I was even upset that the Lord woke me up to see another day that I knew spiritually, emotionally, and mentally, I couldn’t enjoy. It was DARK, very DARK, for me. I would watch tv, listen to music, and even spend majority of my time on Social Media to SUPPRESS how I was feeling. I didn’t want to feel at all sis. It hurt too much. I just wanted it to go away! But ofcourse, that didn’t work. If I could be honest, it only made it worse.

“Lord, what is going on?”, I cried. And Holy Spirit, replied.

“It’s an attack, you must fight back”. My mind couldn’t even process it. I’m used to thinking, “Ohhh it’s just little old me, I deal with this a lot. Its normal.”. I couldn’t come to terms with the fact that someone, the enemy, was afflicting this upon me. And, Not to mention Holy Spirit saying, “YOU have to fight!”…Um, ME?! Sis, I wasn’t used to fighting! I was used to running away from EVERYTHING… LITERALLY. But apparently, today, ALL of that was going to change.

Okay, Whoa… Let’s the process this for a minute!

Sis, I didn’t think I stood a chance.  The enemy was attacking me left and right.  In several ways, He had the upper hand, and I’ll tell you why….I GAVE it to him WILLINGLY and here’s how: ONE, He made me feel ashamed for being broken. SO ashamed that I WOULDN’T open my mouth to ask for help. TWO, He made me feel condemned. Condemned in a sense that God wouldn’t and couldn’t help me because my “WORKS” weren’t sufficient enough. Since I didn’t have the drive to pray or read the word. (You’ll catch that in a minute). THREE, feeling condemned and ashamed IMMEDIATELY stripped me of confidence in my IDENTITY. And, on top of that I didn’t have the TRUTH (The Word) truly grounded in me like I thought I did. In those 2 hits, I completely FORGOT who I was. I WAS POWERLESS. But girly, God is so good! He didn’t reveal those tactics to me, for me to sit back and just sulk in defeat. He gave them to me so that I could FIGHT. STRATEGICALLY. And, I did exactly that!

Where the enemy inflicted me with pride so that I would shy away from asking for help, I did the complete OPPOSITE. I humbled myself and asked around for advice from spiritual people that I trusted (Proverbs 12:15). I expressed ALL that I was going through not knowing that they had been in that season once before too and that Godly wisdom would follow my act of humility. Here are somethings they shared with me:

  1. That this attack is ONLY for a season. And, that as one that follows after Christ, it is common to be afflicted in this way. BUT to press on and fight through it even when my mind and emotions want to take over because God will come to the rescue EVERY time (Psalm 34:19).
  2. God wont DISOWN me because of my faults but loves me in SPITE OF (Psalm 136:2-3) .
  3. That there is no condemnation in Christ (Romans 8:1).
  4. My WORKS does not guarantee my salvation only my FAITH does (Titus 3:5).

Man o’ man , isn’t God good?

Sis, Let me tell YOU! I was speechless. From my simple act of obedience in ASKING for WISDOM(advice/help), the lies of the enemy were trampled by TRUTH of my Heavenly Father! Every single one! They were truths that I “thought” I knew but only knew of and wasn’t really intimate with. I wasn’t well acquainted with the promises that My Father left for me. I was separated from them and therefore separated from the true and unconditional Love of my Father in Heaven; Separated from POWER. And, that’s not the will God has for US.

Sis, We can no longer allow the enemy to conquer us when we have been given the weapons; The Word, Each other, and OUR testimonies. And, that’s why I wanted to apologize to you! Apologize for setting you up for an attack, from the lack of sharing my brokenness. Simply, because of my pride and fear of being judged. Not knowing that there are things that you could learn from my valley experience. Who knew that our very OWN testimonies could be a key to someones BREAKTHROUGH. We hide so much of what we are going through that we deprive our fellow sister of VICTORY. Yes, our trials are hard to accept or express sometimes, BUT there is power is SHARING them. Because someone is looking to see you rise from the valley to the mountain top, so that they can see that IT IS possible.  Our lives are NOT about US. And, in the world we live in, it’s often advertised that way. We are to be here for one another and do life TOGETHER. And the lesson we learn, we can share with others to avoid the same pitfalls the enemy creates.

So, My Sweet Sister… I want to leave you with a couple things, if I may… Because I care for you.  NEVER be afraid to ask for help, please. What you are going through isn’t something that you have to be ashamed of, so share it. EMBRACE IT.  You never know who may be going through something similar and are looking to you for your strength. You never know who may need to see your act of vulnerability in sharing your story that may set them free from a tormenting situation (enabling them to also share). No one can see the Goodness of God if we never show the mess that He has brought us from.Lastly, Chica, KNOW the WORD, STUDY IT, and MEDITATE ON IT! Know the promises that Christ Jesus died on the cross for us to obtain because that’s where the root of the enemy’s attacks stem from. We can NOT lack in knowledge or we WILL perish (Hosea 4:6).

So again sis, I am so sorry and I pray that you forgive me. I love you so much and I vow to NEVER let selfishness and pride overtake me again. I wont let the enemy silence me from YOUR potential victory. From now on I will embrace my brokenness and I will no longer hide it from you. I pray you wont hide it from me either. Let’s make that vow together, aye? TODAY! NO MORE HIDING! Sisters share EVERYTHING! And, I pray my sharing today has been encouraging and inspiring to you in some way! Let’s keep this up, k? 🙂

Well, Till’ Next Time Beautie!

Love you,

Vesta <3

 

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Ready to Bare All

     Hello Beauties!

Okay, let me start here; If I was to say that I am happy to be writing this post again, I would be lying to you…. HEY HEY HEY! Don’t go away, stay here.. I know it is lot of drama for my FIRST post, but hang with me and see where I am going with this. K?

Well, First and foremost, You look quite beautiful today My Sweet Sister! But alright, now on to subject at hand. Like I was saying, I am quite frustrated having to be re-writing this  all over again. The first draft came out of a long yet beautiful morning of creating my prayer wall with posted notes, listening to worship music, and constantly running back and forth to the rest room for tissue to stop my nose from running while I was having my crying sesh. It’s as if it truly came out of sweat blood and tears if you ask me. What I am trying to say is,  I thought it was the most “perfectly written emotional post”. The tone that was set was just PERFECT! Worship music, Jesus, Sticky notes, temper tantrums, and emotions!? What gets better than that? I thought this was “THE ONE”. But apparently that’s not the case. So, Let me tell you what happened.

I first begin spontaneously writing a status and as the music and my emotions swelled, I just kept typing. As I kept viciously spilling, I heard the Lord tell me, “this is your FIRST blog post.”. Well, that SURELY caught me OFF guard! One, because the topic wasn’t one that I would have wanted everyone to see….Brokenness. Mine, to be exact. That was IT, the topic. It was as bare as bare could get. And, I wasn’t ready for that! I wasn’t ready for everyone to see the pit of my emotions in that very moment! And, apparently the enemy didn’t want it either. But God did. Soooooo, I kept typing, and crying, typing, and crying and soon it was done. And I heard the Lord say “Don’t post it here Vesta, post it on your blog”. And, to be honest, I was a little hesitant. I immediately wanted to press that beautiful blue “POST” button but I was convicted.

So instead of posting it to Facebook, I finally submitted to the Lord’s instructions (Hard- headed, right? Yes, I know. I’m praying on it! haha) So I started to log into my Blogging site and I couldn’t log in. I literally tried about 15 times and no luck. I had the post from FB copied and ready to paste it right into my blog and things just weren’t looking to good. I kept trying and trying and checking my log in info and still NOTHING. Then finally after heavy praying and breathing, I was in. I Immediately went to paste, and then,…..nothing. The post was GONE! No where to be found. All that I had gone through to write it, get past my fleshly desires to submit to the Lords instruction, and log into my account…. I could have screamed. BUT then, I heard to tiniest whisper, “It was too powerful for the enemy”, The Lord said. And, First discouragement took over. I truly felt completely defeated. I was seconds from wanting to second guess this calling of writing that the Lord placed on my heart. The thoughts “I KNEW THIS WASN’T FOR ME” scrolled through my brain. BUT, then something clicked.

I could see. It began to make sense. It was ALL a test. I was being tested on where my heart was. If I really knew and comprehended my identity. If, I really was about My Fathers Business. If my heart was truly where it needed to be; ready and willing to join this army full force. Or coward out when circumstances flip against me. I was BEGIN TESTED! And, The enemy thought I was going to fail, BUT God knew different! I was ready and MORE than capable! My Papa said, “It was too powerful!. How GREAT is that?!

 Guys, I am ready. Ready to be bare. Ready to submit to it all. Ready to take the spiritual warfare that comes along with it. I feel the Lord saying, IF I am going to do this. I have to be willing to share the GOOD, BAD, and the UGLY. And MOST of ALL, I have to know this WONT be a walk in the park. And, I can honestly say that I am…I am so excited for this journey with you all.

I know this was A-LOT for My “BREAKING THE ICE” post, BUT, I pray you were able to see the beauty within all of this and get of sense of ME (don’t run away, I am SANE. I promise! lol). Starting my blog has been a huge fight for me; feeling inadequate and constantly attacked. But I am pushing through with FULL confidence in Christ! Praying this place is one that you can be edified, inspired, and encouraged: to grow, live, and learn through the Love of the Lord Jesus Christ! Together! WE are a family! A community! So, WELCOME BEAUTIES! Thank you for joining me on this journey! So Excited for the things to come!

Love you so much,

Vesta <3

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